TRUST


Trust

It's a big thing for me these days. I try hard not to get too caught up in analyzing people or questioning their integrity but sometimes my belly goes crazy on me and I have to take a step back. 

How can we trust people when we have been lied to, cheated, hurt or betrayed by so many in our life? How do we take those experiences and set them aside so that they don't bleed into the rest of our potentially good relationships?

It's hard.. and it shouldn't be. I have been separated/divorced for almost a year now and I still cannot find it in me to trust a mans motives. I mean fully trust without comparing or questioning... I hate that I feel this way, I hate how it feels in my body and I hate knowing that it emanates from me. 

That little hurt girl inside is long gone but that hurt woman is still whispering in the background. She is still picking up the crumbs that are sprinkled in front of her and she is still fantasizing about the day when the truths don't feel like lies and the love doesn't feel temporary or conditional. 

Every day is work in progress for me and I am lucky to be surrounded by so many positive, genuine people who lift me up and cheer me on.. I've made it past broken but now I need to work on getting through the bruised stage.

Stephanie HigginsComment